Anxiety and the Element of Time and Speed

There is an element to anxiety that is frequently overlooked, and that is the element of "time and speed".  It underlies a majority of events that provoke anxiety because it is the key trigger that pushes someone to feel like they need to go faster than they feel safe or comfortable with, and it prevents an individual from having the time to use their contemplative skill of thought to prepare for a situation.

When no preparation time is given, situations are done spontaneously and without forethought.  This can work well if you are someone who is quick on your feet and quick thinking, but most likely you got that way with exposure and practice.  Springing into action with a sharp and immediate awareness of what to do, and doing it, is truly a gift and can also be a developed skill when paired with repetition and practice.

Let's look at a few examples of how time and speed play out when it comes to anxiety:  

First, when someone is nervous driving on a particular road or highway, one of the things playing a factor is how fast things are going and the lack of time to slowly piece together what is happening in such a fast-paced environment.  With time and practice, drivers get use to the demand for speed and develop skills about how much time they need to take an exit, signal and turn a corner, or even stop before reaching a red light.  For those more experienced drivers, these tasks are not the worry, as they might worry that something is going to "suddenly" happen, like a blow out, or sudden accident, or other tragedy they didn't see coming.  So for that kind of driver the anxiety might be more of a "what if" worry that grows arms and legs and becomes a raw danger signal to the body that something bad could happen if speed is not gained or lost.  This triggers the fight or flight in the body, and anxiety symptoms are felt.

Another example of time and speed in relation to anxiety, is the nervous cashier who can see a line forming and knows that the pace of work can only be done so fast.  Perhaps customers are getting impatient and they want the cashier to go faster, thus leading the cashier to begin to worry someone is going to get mad, cause a scene, or begin to demand faster service.  Again, the fight or flight begins to kick in causing shallow breathing, tense muscles, and danger signals in the cashier's body as a full stress response takes place.

Finally, there is the example of the boss who wants an employee to meet a quota, demanding that an employee finish a certain number of tasks, items, or goals by a certain time frame.  Or fill so many orders in one hour, or complete so many entries in the computer in a day, or finish so many tasks before going home, and so on.  In this case, the pressure is on to go faster and faster as stress and anxiety levels rise.  

When we don't have the time to gather our thoughts and contemplate our response, anxiety symptoms climb.  Other examples are things like the demand for an answer before we actually have one developed in our mind, the pressure of being tail-gaited and the insistence that we drive faster than we want to or that the speed limit allows, or another driver honking immediately when the light changes green to tell us to hurry and get going.  

There will always be times in life when we need to keep a particular pace, hurry a bit more, or crank up our attentiveness to a situation so we can act quickly.  There was a time when paying cash was considered a gift in comparison to standing and writing a check?  Yet, now if you don't just swipe your card to pay, the impatience all around you is expressed in the eyes of onlookers.  So if you find that the pressure to go faster and faster is starting to cause a rise in your symptoms of anxiety, then finding ways to approach daily tasks with a new sense of permission to go it a little bit slower, combined with the use of relaxation exercises and the challenging of beliefs which tend to convince you that you must constantly go faster and faster, can have a direct impact on lowering your stress and biological symptoms of anxiety.

Yes, it's true that the world is getting faster and faster, and because of it, anxiety is increasing all over the world.  So keeping up on the increasing need for relaxation techniques is going to be key to adapting to this changing world.  In addition, here are some key words and phrases to look for in your everyday language:  fast, faster, suddenly, out of nowhere, enough, not enough, not enough time, speed up, hurry, in time, late, pressure, slow, slower, get going, in a rush, pushed, pulled, get to it, get going, quickly, get it finished, reach the marker, and faster pace.

Practicing tasks that force you to move steadily and calmly (but not too slow or fast) will give you the skills you need to keep a steady pace without panicking that you are not going fast enough.  It's very difficult to stay calm and steady right at the immediate time of a stressful event, but practicing slow steady relaxation in the midst of stress can improve your ability to stay calm under stressful conditions and without pressure to go faster.

Think of the example of a driver in a hurry who comes across a row of geese crossing the road.  We all know that the moral and ethical thing to do is stop and wait for the waddling lovelies to cross the road.  We have no choice!  The geese will eventually cross the road, in their own darn sweet time, of course.  But we are forced to go at a pace that is not what the world was demanding of us 15 seconds ago.  In that moment you can feel the pressure of a fast-paced world demanding that you go faster, but a present moment situation focus has a more calm and relaxed practice.  And this is the idea--the calm in the midst of the storm.

Here is a very brief video of a Zen walking-meditation called Kinhin, in which you work at a steady pace to practice developing a sense of concentration and present moment focus.  It is typically used by practitioners between rounds of seated meditation in order to stretch the body or just move it around a little before sitting down again for another round of prolonged seated meditation.  It's this kind of developed concentration that can be taken with you out and into a fast-paced world where it is very difficult to use at first, but with practice you can get better and better at facing the insistent speed demands of the world so they don't overwhelm you.  The intention is not to walk this slow out in the real world and make people try to get around you, but to use the slow pace of Kinhin meditation practice to sharpen your focus using a pace that works for you when you are out in that fast-paced world.

We know that the world will not stop pressuring us to go at the faster and faster pace it wants.  You can keep up or resist, and the choice between those two isn't what really matters.  What matters is where your mind is during any of these speeds.  Is it still present despite the tail-gaiter, or long line, or bosses demands?  Is it still at homeostasis, having steady breathing, a steady heart rate, and a steady mind?  Or is it wrapped up in meeting the unrealistic demands of a world that's going too fast?

"Adopt the pace of nature.  Her secret is patience".  Ralph Waldo Emerson

Walking in the Rain: A Mindfulness Practice

It's true there is a category of individuals that don't like the rain.  They find it depressing and oppressive, or perhaps believe it is something that is interfering with their sunshine, gardening, and blue-sky day.  But there is another group of people who find something very relaxing about rain.  They enjoy going out for walks on a rainy day, or just being lulled to sleep by the sound of rain.  And for them, the rain is a welcome arrival of comfort and peace.

No doubt this is why so many relaxation recordings and videos have been made that include rain, and why there is an entire industry that designs and sells water fountains, water sound machines, and landscaping developments that have water fountains and elements of water built into them.  But specifically going out and walking in the rain can be an entire form of meditation all in itself, and is an exercise in mindfulness practice because it includes all of the senses.  

When going for a stroll out in the rain, you will eventually feel it at some point on your skin, but there is also a smell to rain as well, as it hits the pavement, wood, and foliage all around you.  And the sound itself is a relaxing one because it has a steady ongoing rhythm that tends to be consistent like a running stream.  

Out in the element of rain the other senses are also activated and the atmosphere can range from foggy and overcast to partly cloudy and rainbow images in the sky, but typically the visual image is much softer on the eyes so you don't have to squint or strain to protect them from bright light.  A cleansing feeling is common when walking out in the rain as the dust, pollen, and maybe even ruminating thoughts are all washed away.

Add fog to the mix and many people have described a walk in the rain like being wrapped in a warm blanket.  In fact, as clouds move in and even lower, sound becomes more muffled and much softer so any conversation has a gentle feel to it that is soft and relaxed.  

The next time it rains, consider a nice meditative walk out in the elements.  Grab your umbrella and rain coat and use the event as a way to practice your relaxation and mindfulness skills.  Stay as present as you can and focus on the senses.  Instead of just closing the rain out or distracting yourself until it is done, try not to miss the chance to fully experience the rain in this lifetime.

"You cannot touch the clouds, you know; but you can feel the rain and know how glad the flowers and the thirsty earth are to have it after a hot day."   ~Helen Keller

Thanks to Y'amal for the great photo, https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

Autumn: The symbolic push to seize the moment

There is something about Autumn that everyone seems to like.  Ask most anyone and they will express a like for the cooler temperatures, wearing their favorite sweaters at last, walking in the colorful Fall leaves, or drinking warm beverages like coco, cider and tea.

It's the time of year where we can capitalize on relaxation, creativity, and a connection with nature since it is comfortable enough to be out in the elements, and the season offers something for all of the senses.

But this time of year also offers a lot of symbolism about life, transitions and the reality that nothing ever stays the same, everything is in constant change, and there is evidence all around us that we don't have forever to do the things we want to do in this lifetime.

Robert Frost put it well in his classic poem (so symbolic of Autumn in itself), 

Nothing Gold Can Stay:

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold,
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

I'm reminded of the existentialists who frequently get accused of being the downers in life, but in reality they are the writers and thinkers who bring to light the need for all of us to come home to the present moment, which is where life actually exists.  They push us a little bit to find meaning in our lives.  They are the questioners of life itself and encourage us to ask, "What does it mean to exist?" But more than that, they push us to find meaning in this existence that brings us such constant change, including birth and death.  Why is it that this transitional time of year, which symbolically represents death and the reality that "nothing gold can stay"-- is so beautiful, and so welcomed and enjoyed by most?

There is something very relaxing in getting out and enjoying this time of year.  Be sure to get out and walk among the leaves and colors and let your senses take it all in.  The smell, the sight, the sound... And while you are out there, be sure to ask yourself, "Why am I here?"  "What is my personal meaning in this life?"  Are you waiting around for some other person, organization, or entity to define this for you?  What would it be like to create this meaning for yourself?  What are you waiting for?  Nothing gold can stay!  

Thanks to Ian Sane for the great photo

Reducing Stress during the Holiday Season

Though they are advertised as the most pleasant seasonal events of the year, the holidays can actually be some of the most stressful times for many people.  Much of the media during these times insists that everyone feel jolly, happy, joyful and thrilled to no end about spending money they don't have in order to satisfy the gift-giving season.  Unfortunately, this expectation is unrealistic for those who find the holidays (and the time of year) depressing and difficult.

That's why self acceptance is very important during the holidays.  If you don't feel all that thrilled about the holidays, you don't have to hide it, but you can find ways to try to make the very best of a time when your emotions are not in alignment with the external world's demands.

First of all, stop to think about what it is you personally need during the holidays.  Is it just relaxation?  Time with your family?  Some kind of traditional event that makes things feel right for you?  Sometimes the holidays get even harder when we feel pulled in all directions by the demands of others who are trying to get their needs met as well.  It's important to find a balance and make sure you are not getting spread too thin.  Saying no to some things is okay, and saying yes to your own needs can be a part of the formula for a good holiday.

Money is always a stressful factor during the holiday season as well.  It's okay to make it clear to others that you need to limit your spending, so be sure to speak up.  Suggesting that the family or office crew draw names to reduce the number of gift spending is always wise and helps reduce financial worries.

If the holidays aren't your thing, try to plan some events that feel more in tune to what you need, be they non-holiday themed movies, concerts, trips, books, socials with friends or just solo getaways that reduce your exposure to the media hype and promotions.

Don't be surprised if there are others out there that feel the same way and would love to get together with you to do something "non-festive".  Check in with some of your friends and family and see if any are up to the task of finding something that can remove you in any small way from triggers that contribute to your depression and stress during this time of year. 

Here are some ideas of things you can do to cope with your stress and anxiety during the holidays:

*Go hiking or snowshoeing which pulls you into nature and away from media hype
*Go see a non-holiday themed movie during the day when crowds are low
*Go for a walk or bike ride where festive decorations and music are not heard
* Limit your spending by announcing to others you plan to give limited gifts this year
*Say no if you need to when others demand you fly or travel to see them for the holidays
*Be sure to share and delegate shopping and other tasks to your spouse or other relatives
*Explain to children you are not made of gold and they can't have everything they want
*Above all, take time to sit down now and then to relax and take a breath.

Thanks to William Brawley for the lovely holiday photo
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

Walking Meditation

Meditation comes in many forms.   From guided voice meditation, to silent sitting.  There is moving meditation such as Qigong and Tai Chi, and a form of meditation that works well for those who find it too difficult to sit still for any length of time--That is, walking meditation.

Walking meditation is frequently used between rounds of seated meditation in order to help stretch the body and give it a little break before returning to the meditation mat to sit some more.

However, you can use walking meditation in many different ways.  Some find it relaxing and centering to take a break from their busy work day to go to a park and walk the paths, or through the grass, to get a little more focused on the present moment.

Walking meditation can also be used as a way to move the body, yet stay focused on just one thing, such as the sound of the birds as you walk among the trees or just the sound of water if you are walking near a fountain or stream.

You can also practice synchronizing your breath with the walk.  Counting "one" as you breath in while stepping with the left foot, and "two" as you exhale and step with the right.  Or if you want a faster pace, you can count "one" to inhale as you take several steps, and count "two" for the next several steps.  You can also place complete focus and attention on the placement of the foot.  Heel, toe... heel, toe... while working to not allow any thoughts or distractions to draw attention away from this mindful task.

You don't have to force yourself to do a meditation that is not comfortable for you.  Buddha was meditating in a reclined position when he died.  Perhaps you've seen the statue of him lying on his side called the "Reclining Buddha".  Some people who find it difficult to sit up during meditation will practice that way (i.e., lying down), and their task is to not fall asleep, but to stay awake and mindful.

So it's the same with walking meditation.  If you choose a moving meditation rather than a sitting, or still meditation (such as standing meditation), the task is always the same...to train the mind to remain present and completely aware.

Thanks to World Peace Initiative for the great photo

Relaxation in the Public Parks

Thanks to the Trust for Public Lands (TPL), we have a lot of wonderful parks preserved right in our cities and residential areas.  These great places have been plucked out and conserved so that we all have nice areas to go relax, fly kites, play with the dog, have a picnic, or just enjoy being around some semblance of nature.  A park is a great place to find green grass, trees, fountains, benches and tables, as well as bike paths or scenic views.

You've probably driven by one of these nice parks every day during your hectic and stressful work schedule without hardly giving it a glance, but when was the last time you actually stopped to enjoy the peacefulness of one of these great places?

Because many parks are preserved close to residential and business areas, it's convenient to wander in during your lunch hour or even on your break (if you get one), and steal away even 5 or 10 minutes of relaxation.  The parks tend to draw a little bit of wildlife as well, such as ducks and geese, and give us however-little of a brief reminder that the concrete and steel we exist in throughout our day is not really the environment of our origin, and certainly doesn't fit with our natural instincts.

Parks are designed with relaxation and leisure in mind.  They cater to the individual who wants a moment to rest -- to sit in the grass, look at the trees, or walk a lot slower than the usual rush-and-hurry of the typical hectic work day.  Parks are where the casual picnic takes place, or where you can chew on a blade of grass, fumbling with a fallen twig, or kick off your shoes and feel the earth and cool grass beneath you.

Modern humans live inside boxes now --inside wood, plastic and chalk walls.  Parks help bring us back to our senses and remind us we are not made of those things.  We are a part of nature and even a small taste of this nature -- preserved for us in the form of parks -- is a great way to check in with the pulse of life and your connection to it.  It's a way to remind yourself who you are, and where you come from.

It's hard for some to give up the gadgets to go and taste a little of this nature's delight, but if you can manage it, leave the cell phone and MP3 player in your car, or shut off in your bag.  Why spoil a good thing?

Thanks to Ryan Latta for the great photo

Autumn is a time for Rejuvination and Relaxation

Autumn is a favorite time of year for many people.  It's not too hot, not too cold, and is filled with an array of changing colors among the trees and plants.  It's a great time to get out and see the changing colors and go for relaxing walks in the parks, hills and mountains.

This relaxing time of year has a lot of symbolism to it.  In Greek mythology it was believed that during this time of year Hades came up from the underworld and snatched the young and beautiful Persephone away, leaving Demeter (The Mother) grieving in agony for her kidnapped daughter, and so she refused to allow things to grow.  Thus, the dying of things and the changing colors.  It was believed, however, that they worked it all out, as Hades agreed to let Persephone come back up to her normal life in the Spring time, which of course is when Demeter stops grieving and allows all the flowers and plants to bloom again.  Until then, however, the earth was thought to be grieving as things died off for the winter, not to return again until Spring.

This symbolism of Persephone (a symbolic representation of all that is young and vibrant and lively) "going away" for a time, is seen in everything from the seasonal hibernation of the bear and the seasonal depression experienced by humans, to the falling of the leaves and dormancy of the trees and plants for winter.  It's as if everything is joining in Demeter's sorrow and falling into a slump of grief for the seasonal loss of life and vibrancy.

But wait, it's not all for doom and gloom.  Some versions of the story say that Persephone eventually wanted to stay in the underworld for part of the year just to bring her brightness and liveliness to those in despair.  In the same way, this time of year allows us to go within and do a little self nurturing.  In a way, we hibernate a little bit during this time of year, just like the bears do.  We go within as it gets darker earlier and spend a little more time sleeping, curling up with a blanket, and reading a good book.  In the Fall and winter months, we humans tend to fatten up a little as we crave heavier foods, and we rest a little more as we feel tired earlier in the evening as the sun sets sooner.  Grief often mimics the symptoms of depression, but in reality, it's only temporary sorrow that our bright and sunshiny days are shortened for a time.

Walking out amongst the fallen leaves can help us stay in touch with what is happening in the natural world as the seasons change.  It helps us to remember that we are a part of that same changing world, which means we are literally and biologically changing with the seasons as they transition from one time of the year to the next.  Feeling the crunch of drying leaves under our feet puts us in touch with an element inside us that is signaling for a resting period -- a rejuvenation period just as the trees shed their leaves and pull in for the winter --not to die off, but to remain dormant until Spring. 

The old myths also include a strong focus on this being a time of year for "harvesting".  While the element of growth and life (Persephone) is gone for a time, it's a great time to harvest what you've sown and let the "planting fields" of your life rest for awhile.  It's a good time for long walks in the woods, contemplation, slowing down, and taking time to rest.  It helps to challenge those culturally implanted ideas that we should feel vibrant all year long, which goes against the natural order of things and only leads to feelings of inadequacy and failure when we naturally feel like resting for awhile.  In addition, creativity surfaces only when things have settled down a little bit.  Once we've had our good rest, new seeds will sprout again.

Thanks to Julie Falk for her great photo - Autumn Days

The Relaxation of Moving Meditations

When we think of meditation, most of us picture someone in a seated position, remaining very still and upright, with eyes closed (or half closed), who might perhaps be working to monitor their thoughts, which rise and fall spontaneously.  But there is another kind of meditation called moving meditation, which is woven into various types of activities, particularly relaxing exercises such as Qigong, Tai Chi and Yoga.

With this in mind, we must reconsider what “meditation” means.  Is it just sitting still and  working to monitor the thoughts as they drift in and out of the mind?  Or is meditation about trying to remain fully present in any activity--be it sitting, standing, walking or other forms of movement? 

Whether one is attempting to stay in the present moment by not chasing every thought that arises, or whether one is trying to simply monitor the breath moment by moment, the common denominator is that meditation is that practice and effort which helps the practitioner stay in the moment regardless of activity.  Seated meditation is a meditation that represents physical stillness (as is standing meditation practice), but mindful meditation can take place in the movement of any activity be it the gracefulness of Tai Chi, or the skillful art of archery.

Tai Chi Chuan and Qigong are only a couple of the various forms of moving meditations, but you don't have to know a skilled martial art in order to use mindful and moving meditation in your life.  Walking can also be done in the form of a moving meditation, as can dance, running, or any other sports activity such as golfing.  The common theme that runs through them all is your state of mind--are you fully present and aware at this moment?

I once heard a meditation teacher say that the only difference between skilled meditation practitioners who go about their day walking to various activities and such, and those who are not skilled, is that the skilled practitioners are aware that they are walking and moving, and the unskilled individuals are not.

Every moment of your day is a moment to practice mindfulness.  Movement does not mean that mindful meditation has stopped.

Thanks to Reed George for his great photo - Kyudo Practitioner 

Walking Mediation for Relaxation

Going for a walk can be very relaxing.  It can also be a form of moving meditation, just like tai chi or qigong, in which you hold the mind in the present moment.

In our everyday life we may walk too fast as we hurry from place to place to complete the errands and tasks of our day.  But walking mindfully is very different.  When you walk mindfully, you are aware of your walking.  To be aware of your walking, you must be fully present.  So, trying various walking meditation exercises to strengthen your mindfulness is key.  Here are some ideas: 

First, you can synchronize your steps with the inhalation and the exhalation, and therefore place your attention on no other task.  For instance, you might inhale for 3 or four slow steps, and then exhale for three or four steps, and repeat.

Another idea is to place all of your focus on the bottom of your feet.  Notice as the heel touches the ground, then how it rolls from back to front, bending at the toes, and finally pulls off the ground.  Then follow the attention to the other foot to do the same thing, and so on.

You might also direct your attention to the present by focusing on the senses as you walk.  In other words, as you stroll along, notice what you hear, see, smell, taste in the air, and feel on your skin.  Perhaps you will notice the sound of many birds that you hadn’t noticed before, or maybe you will realize the colors around you are brilliant due to a rising or setting sun.

When you feel ready, here is an idea that might take some practice.  Fill a medium sized bowl or cup with water to the brim, and carry it with you as you walk (this may take both hands).  Think of the water as the precious substance of life for which you don’t want to spill.  As you walk, focus your attention on the bowl or cup of water, and try not to spill a drop.  This will also require that you—at the same time—watch your step, go slow, and move mindfully, all of which leads you to stay very present and attentive to your walking.

All of these exercises simply help you learn to clear your mind of unnecessary clutter, which in turn, helps you to relax and refrain from worry.

Thanks to Hartwig HKD for the great photo Zen Walk