Artemis II: A Reminder of the Power of Mindfulness

Every now and then humanity is reminded of what it is outside of the borders, wars, and problems it has created for itself.  The recent Artemis II space flight mission around the moon was just such a reminder in which one of the astronauts, Christina Koch said, "There are no lines." Meaning, what she saw of us from space is oceans, weather systems, and no borders.  A complete whole.  One.

The mission was something the world's population have been needing, to remind us of how deeply we've become engrossed in our petty systemic bickering and violence toward one another, and how much we've forgotten who we really are on what Carl Sagan called, "a pale blue dot".

Out here in the vast universe, our existence is something to behold.  We can choose to live in awe or we can bury our heads in the sand of chaos and never look up until our last breath, when we may find ourselves wondering what we missed.

When stress is part of our everyday lives we may not look up at the sky for days, weeks or even months until some spectacular sunrise or sunset catches our eye, or we find ourselves outside under a star-filled sky on some wonderful summer's evening and are reminded of what Victor Glover described as this "oasis" called Earth, floating out in space.

Mindfulness practices help us come back to just what is happening right this minute.  The heartbeat, sounds, the feel of the temperature, the taste of things, the smell of things, and what the glorious human eye is seeing.  Even if it sees darkness.

The difference between humans that are going through this one precious life asleep and those going through it awake, is that those who are awake, are aware.  It's the difference between being on this planet and functioning, and being on this planet and functioning while fully "aware" that one is on this planet and functioning.

The crew of Artemis II were probably four of the most aware human beings on and off the planet recently.  Literally thrust into awareness by the strike of the universal Zen Master's stick, who called them to the full attention of reality.  On return they expressed their awe and heightened view of the oneness of who we all are.  Reminding us that our imaginary borders are in the way of our attempts to wake up, and they can't be seen from the vastness of space.

Does that mean that our everyday battles and hardships are not real?  No, but it does mean that waking up is important.  Staying mindful matters.  Not getting lost in this chaotic world so much that you forget who you are and what you are a part of.

Mindfulness practices are not just a fad.  They are a practice and a discovery that can benefit you and your relationships, as well as your community, country and the planet.  It's about the hope that as many people as possible, on this pale blue dot, will be both awake and aware.  In this way the Earth and the living things that make it what it is, will be a system of self-care and not one of self-destruction.

"It's a special thing to be a human and it's a special thing to be on planet Earth."  Reid Wiseman (Artemis II Mission Commander).

Thanks to NASA for the great image from the Orion spacecraft 2026

Feeling Powerless: Stress and the Way out of Helplessness

I'm hearing from a lot of people lately about how powerless they feel about current events.  Be it the wars around the world, or the economy, or loss of confidence in leadership, the general consensus is that many feel, "There's nothing I can do about it."  Which reminds me of a term I explained a lot in the early years of my career in counseling while doing my practicum in a college campus counseling center using biofeedback machines to help people learn to regulate their stress response.  That term is, Learned Helplessness.

The term was coined by Martin Seligman in the 1960's based on research he did with Steven Maier, which basically found that if we come to believe we are helpless over a situation, we begin to give up.  The research helped us learn a lot about depression in particular, and why symptoms of depression worsen when we feel there is "nothing we can do" to change or help ourselves or a situation.  Anxiety and depression tend to go hand in hand because the more powerless one feels about their anxiety, the more likely they are to also have some level of depression.

But there is an even older concept than Learned Helplessness in my field of study that was around long before I even saw my first client.  It's a term that was popular in addiction recovery circles but applied to many areas of personal growth and self-discovery.  The phrase was created by a religious man, Reinhold Reinbuhr, a theologian who had written it into one of his sermons.   But you don't have to be a religious person to see it has great psychological meaning and truth to it:  "Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

The phrase urges us to seek serenity (a state of peacefulness and calm tranquility) in knowing when something is beyond our control.  It's bigger than us, and no matter how hard we might try, we are not going to be able to move it in any direction.  But the second part--the part about finding the courage to change the things we can?  That's a little bit harder.  Probably even harder than the third part of the phrase, which is the wisdom to know the difference between the two, which is hard enough in itself.

Now here is where the two phrases and lessons come together:   It's one thing to realize what we are powerless over, and another thing to overlook that we are not powerless over everything.  There can also be a hidden belief in one's mind that they are also powerless over their ability to have courage to change the things they still have power to change in this world.  Cognitively, if we fall prey to Learned Helplessness, and take the bait of believing we have no power to make changes in the world, then feelings of helplessness and hopelessness get their teeth in, and the giving up begins.  The hopelessness and helplessness get in through the cracks.

Let's look at an example:  Say you are realizing that global pollution is far beyond your personal capacity to change.  You see it, realize it, know it's bigger than you and you begin to let go.  The serenity comes from finding peace in knowing that, though you don't like it very much, you can accept that it's beyond what you could ever do in the days you have left on this planet.  So yes, you give up on any grandiose belief that you could ever single-handedly accomplish such a thing.  Letting go of such an unrealistic expectation is just good self-care.

Yet, that doesn't mean you give up on everything, or on seeing what you can do.  You can't single-handedly save the whole planet, and not even the country you live in.  Nor can you save the entire state or area you reside in.  But if you pull it in closer to home, you might be able to begin seeing something within reach in your own town, community, neighborhood, or possibly just within your own home.  This is the "wisdom to see the difference".

Accepting what you cannot change also helps you begin to see what you can change.  But many of us tend to feel that's not good enough.  We want something bigger.  Grander.  Something that fixes the big problem we already admitted we can't fix.  So it's important to scale it down and accept that your small part matters.  And if it's all each of us can do, then think of how important it is to urge others to do their part.  That is something you are capable of!

It's okay to believe you really are helpless over things far beyond your capacity.  But it doesn't mean you have no power, and it doesn't mean you are helpless over everything.  The wisdom to know the difference is where you can get your power back.  Accepting the smaller scale things that are within your reach really does matter.  This is the part that takes courage.  Moving the desire for a better world into action.

And yes!  We can do better.  We have the capacity as a whole to do better.  Each and every one of us!  And though we are helpless over some large-scale things, we are not helpless over everything.  It takes courage to see that and act nonviolently, and with peace as the ultimate goal.

You can read more about practice and determination in my June 2023 blog entry here

"Courage doesn't always roar.  Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, 'I will try again tomorrow'."     ~Mary Anne Radmacher

Thans to John Morton for the great photo, https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/deed.en

Falling Well: Finding your ability to Cope under pressure

Who are you when the going gets rough?  And are you prepared if life gets even rougher?  How will you handle it?  What will you discover about yourself?

We actually have no idea what version of ourselves we will discover in a given situation until we are actually in it.  Will we be brave?  Or run like hell?  And will we be able to tell if and when either one of those responses is or was the right one for us personally.

Catastrophic Thinking is one of the ways we walk ourselves right into a mental corner and become convinced that under certain circumstances we won't be able to cope with a given situation if it were to occur.  We say to ourselves, "I won't be able to handle it."  "That will be too much for me."  "I'm sure that would be the point of no return."  "I can't do it."

One method for countering this kind of thinking is to "decatastrophize" the situation by using a few thought experiments in which you walk a little farther into the situation in your mind and imagine that instead of being paralyzed into inaction, you find your way out.  In other words, rather than allowing your mind to just shut down at the thought of imagining the worse-case scenario, to instead visualize seeing yourself handling the situation to the best of your ability.  Even if it means hardship.

With Catastrophic Thinking we tend to overestimate danger, and underestimate our ability to cope with it.  For instance, as we age we might become fearful of falling.  This can lead to an overestimation of how bad a fall would be, how much damage might come from such a fall, and an underestimation of our ability to handle both the fall and any injuries that might come from the fall.  But a thought experiment, including information about the ways athletes fall and martial artists learn to roll or prevent injury during falls, can give us material to come back to our thinking and imagine a way in which we might cope much better during a fall than we ever imagined.  The Catastrophic thought can be decatastrophized and you create a way in your mind's-eye to see yourself "falling well".  And not only falling well, but recovering from any fall injury, well.

Decatastrophizing includes avoiding the overestimation of danger by looking at our fears more realistically.  This can be used in any number of situations in life where we can reinterpret the situation and see a more realistic view with possibilities and better outcomes.  It also means a more realistic look at our ability to cope in life, based on our history, skills, advanced reasoning, and a better estimation of our ability to stay in the game and cope well in many situations.

Take a look at your most frequent recurring fears and ask yourself if you are overestimating the danger and underestimating your ability to cope.  Rather than continuing to fall into the Catastrophic trap of believing you cannot ever allow bad things to happen because you wouldn't be able to handle it, try on the thought experiment of decatastrophizing the situation in your mind.  It makes all of the difference in the world between becoming paralyzed with fear, and pushing your comfort zone.  

You can read more about Catastrophic Thinking and Faulty Thinking Styles from my March, 2018 blog entry here

"You must do the thing you think you cannot do"     ~Eleanor Roosevelt

Thanks to Lisa Ann Yount for the great image, https://creativecommons.org/publicdomain/zero/1.0/deed.en

The Moving Mind: How we see the World

There is an interesting Zen story about two monks who are looking up at a flagpole. It goes something like this:  "Two monks spend two months looking up at a flagpole as part of their practice.  One says, "The flag is moving."  The other says, "The wind is moving."  They argue back and forth, unable to agree.  When the Zen master walks by, she says, "Neither the flag nor the wind is moving.  Your mind is moving."

There are many versions of this story, but the general interpretation, meaning or lesson is similar in all.  That we are so busy wanting to explain things and have a solid answer, and then defend that view or belief, that we actually miss the present moment and remain unable to see that it's the internal filter of our own minds that make our particular and personal reality what it is.  So attached to our own judgments, interpretations, opinions, views, and expectations, we miss what is really there, right now.  

Your mind is moving.

Where can we see these similar lessons in life?  Two people arguing over how to make the brownies.  Walnuts or no walnuts?  Both missing the reality of their moment together, alive and breathing. Or how about two owners of the same pet arguing over how to have the dog groomed.  Short or with design?  Both missing the potential of a co-created event, and instead miffed about the outcomes.  Then there is the local politics.  Two parties arguing over how to use the town funding.  Invest in local ponds or build a new shooting range?  Each sure of their stance and all missing the opportunity for real compromise in the present.  Finally, what about the warring countries?  Each defending their personal view, politics, or religion, and overlooking the destruction of bombs on an already dying and environmentally threatened planet they share.

It was the American Zen teacher, Joko Beck, author of Everyday Zen and Nothing Special, who wrote about how it is our minds that create suffering and separation, and she spoke at length about how we humans can be so cruel and harmful to one another since we all judge and react from that place of the moving mind.  That internal filter we are so attached to and so defensive of.  Not one of us is free of this human flaw.  But we can get a little better over time if we realize the Zen master was right.  "Your mind is moving".  It's not a good or bad thing.  It's just something to notice and pay attention to.

When it comes to things like depression or anxiety, even anger or resentment, we could say, don't blame the flag or the wind.  Look instead to your one moving mind.  What is it doing?  How is it hanging on to its own view, its own belief system, its own judgment about your depression or anxiety?  Look for the purest awareness of reality you can find.  We could argue at length about the causes of these as well as anger and resentment.  But what is real?  What is opinion?  What is belief?  What is actually happening?  Do you truly know?  You can theorize it's the traffic or your irritation with your spouse, but if you pause you can try one step further in looking with your purest mind's awareness and see that no matter the cause, your mind is having its say about it.

Sometimes we interpret situations as more dangerous than they really are.  This sends messages to the body that there is danger when there isn't and the body reacts.  Sometimes we see things happening in the world and tell ourselves, "It's all hopeless", when it isn't.  This sends messages to the body to give up, and it reacts.  We can look out at our country today and see the behavior of fellow citizens and we create a story in our head.  "It's the flag moving", or "It's the wind".  But don't forget what makes those views your own.  Your Mind is Moving

You can read more about mindsets and cognitive restructuring in one of my earlier blog entries from February 2020 here

"Anxiety is always a gap between the way things are and the way we think they ought to be"     Joko Beck

Thanks to Kitty Terwolbeck for the great photo, https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/deed.en