Sitting Still: The Power of Relaxation

According to Peter Russell, author of Waking Up in Time, our world continues to accelerate with each passing year, month, day and hour.  As the world’s pace gets faster and faster, humans feel compelled to find ways of keeping up with it. 

Let’s face it, if you don’t keep up, you can’t really function in some respects.  Take, for example, the need to keep somewhat savvy about computers, or to adhere to the use of credit cards and electronic banking.  Without these, most would be unable to set up the daily use of things need to function, such as access to daily news and on-line job applications, or as equally important, the ability to communicate quickly by means of cell phones and texting.

There is a growing demand on us to hurry and rush as soon as we set our feet on the floor each morning.  Yet, despite the reality of these growing demands on us—and actually, because of them—it is all the more clear that there is a need to counter balance this growing pace with useful coping techniques that can help us find balance in a world that is spinning too fast sometimes.  We can choose to create our own daily schedule that has pockets of time in which we can go at our own pace.

The increasing pace of the world has also left many people with a restlessness about them.  It's not uncommon these days for people to feel uncomfortable with sitting still.  Literally... just sitting still.  Stillness not only seems unfamiliar to many, but leads to an internal dialogue that sounds something like this:  "This is a waste of time!", "There are so many other things I need to do", "I don't have time for this", etc.

In addition, our bodies have been so conditioned at this point to go go go, and been prodded to have endless tasks, chores, events and work, that we become restless with the very thought of sitting still.

That said, it's obvious that building some stillness back into one's life may need to be taken in small bits.  Reintroducing some time to simply sit in stillness may have to begin with just 5 minutes.  That's enough to start and can always be increased if you feel your getting somewhere.  Think of it as just what the doctor ordered, as the Zen saying goes:  "For quick, fast-acting relief, try slowing down."

Thanks to Balint Foldesi for his great photo, https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

End of Year Stress Reduction

I once saw a video of a grizzly bear running into a river stream to catch salmon.  It was so excited about the abundance of fish that it would catch one and rush back to shore with it, get it half eaten, and then notice another fish in the water, at which point it would drop the one it had and rush back in the water to get the next one.  Then it would do the same with the next fish and before you knew it, the bear had two or three fish going at once and was actually missing out on the full experience of eating each one because it was so distracted by wanting them all.

Reaching the end of the year can be a bit like that as we may barely get our holiday gifts open and our year-end events complete, before we see more awaiting us when the calendar turns at midnight on December 31st.

The end of the year can be peaceful and rewarding, especially if you've had a good year and have many things to be thankful for.  But it can also be very stressful as well.

Some see December 31st, not as a time for celebration, but worry and panic about what has not been finished for the year and the looming tasks pressing for attention, such as setting new goals and the coming need to file taxes and start the new year on an uncluttered note.

First things first!  It's important to finish what you're doing first so as not to miss it completely.  In other words, you can't be mindful about finishing the year if your thoughts are already "not present", but ruminating about the future.

Staying on one task at a time is not only important, it's all you can do really.  Anyone who tells you it's possible to mindfully do more than one task at a time is eating one fish and eyeing another at the same time, and missing out on both. 

Think about this.  If you spend the moments between Christmas Day and New Years Day worrying about the new year, then you miss all the moments in between.  The end of December never happens because you aren't present to experience it.

Allow yourself to enjoy the end of the year and savor the fish you have.  When the new year arrives, you'll know it, and it's then that you can go after more fish.

Thanks to Harald Deischinger for the great photo

Making a Relaxing Holiday

The Holiday season is a time for cheer and celebration, but it can also be a great time of stress for many.

On this Christmas Day you may find yourself picking up wrapping paper and looking at a house turned upside down by the joy of gift giving and visiting relatives.  That's why it's all the more important to take some time to re-energize.

Little things on this special day can help you find the energy you need to make it through the final visits, farewells and clutter clearing.  Here are some ideas:

1.  Relish that morning cup of tea or coffee by making it a mindful moment.  Focusing just on the warmth of the cup, the flavor, the visual of the steam coming up from the surface.

2.  Notice the traditional aromas around you that you may not smell again until next year.  The smell of the pine tree, candles and even seasonal foods that are only cooked this time of year.

3.  Savor your time with relatives that may not be seen again for 6 to 12 months.

4.  Don't forget to fit in your daily meditation, even if you have to fit it in just before bed or in the early morning before your guests awake.

5.  Sing holiday songs that are only fitting once every twelve months.  Put in a CD or find some of the nice music online.

6.  Savor your time off from work while it's here.  Hang out by the tree and take in the joy of your holiday decorations since they will not be up again for an entire year.

**Laugh!

Thanks to Shimelle Laine for her great holiday photo

Abdominal Breathing: A way to reduce Anxiety and Stress

One of the original blog entries for this site was on the topic of how abdominal breathing helps to reduce stress and anxiety.  You can read that blog entry here  Abdominal Breathing: Your Secret Weapon Against Symptoms of Anxiety

Because that blog was so popular, it’s clear that many people are interested in information about using abdominal breathing to help them reduce stress and anxiety, and it’s a good thing, because it works very well.

Many times people will try abdominal breathing and feel it’s either too hard, or they will judge themselves and believe they are doing it wrong.  Usually, the reason it feels difficult or wrong is because stressful breathing has become habitual at that point and most likely has replaced natural and normal breathing patterns.  You could say that the unnatural breathing has become the new normal, or at least what feels normal.  Un-learning the bad form of breathing will feel unnatural at first, even difficult, but you can become better at it with practice.

It helps to understand that the diaphragm is a muscle that sits below the rib cage and when you flex your tummy, the tight muscles push the diaphragm upward and into the bottom of your lungs, thus crowding the lower part of the lungs.  This pressure under your lungs leaves less room for air to enter, so you get less air and tend to breathe more into the upper chest, which is more like hyperventilating than really breathing in a relaxed way. 

If you relax your tummy instead, and even let it pooch out a little when you breathe in, this lowers the diaphragm and allows the lower part of the lungs to relax downward and fill with more fresh air.  This brings more oxygen into the body with every inhalation, and takes more toxic carbon dioxide out with each exhalation.  For a while, you may have to consciously work at extending your tummy each time you breathe in, and consciously push your tummy inward each time you exhale, just until this starts to become more natural and the new normal.   

Take it slow and be patient with yourself.  Most of all, stop believing those false social norms that say you should suck or hold your gut in or try to flatten your stomach by holding your breath or flexing your stomach all the time.  Those false beliefs only make you more tense and perpetuate even more unhealthy breathing.

Thanks to Robert Couse-Baker for the great photo - The Winds of Spring

Feng Shui: A Creative way to Reduce Stress

According to the ancient art of Feng Shui,  how you arrange your living environment and how it works in harmony with you, has a strong influence on your level of well-being and relaxation.  This can range from the selection of a building's location, to the design of a garden or living room.  Everything from the choice of color, to the location where an item is placed may have an influence on the overall energy in a given room, building, office, or landscape.

Basically, it’s all about how you arrange, position, and design your surroundings and the things in the environment in which you dwell.  The belief is that you can improve the flow of energy in these environments and bring balance and harmony into the areas in which you spend time, which subsequently then influences other areas of your life—like relationships, health, and professional success.

There are some key things you can try that target stress reduction and ways to enhance relaxation.  For instance, it has been found that using the color blue in your room design can lead to a soothing feeling for occupants.  In addition, including aspects of nature results in a feeling of relaxation, such as including plants, water fountains, or canvas wall hangings of nature.

Be sure to de-clutter your rooms and put things away as the clutter is only a reflection of a mind cluttered with thoughts and worry.  Using candle or natural incense is very powerful as many scents have a strong influence on mood, memory, and thought.

When it comes to relaxation, your environment should be arranged so as to bring about a quiet and peaceful setting for everything from reading to meditation.  You will definitely see a difference in your level of stress and worry when you take the time to be mindful about arranging your surroundings.

Thanks to Tanaka Juuyho for the photo - Japanese traditional style house

Biofeedback for Stress and Anxiety

Biofeedback has been around a long time and is a great way to become more aware of how your body reacts to stress and anxiety.  It also helps you discover what you can do to train your body to respond differently and in ways that are less stressful for both your body and mind.

When you are learning Biofeedback, you are hooked up to various sensors—such as a sensor to measure perspiration, or a sensor to measure muscle activity—that then feed this information back to recording or measuring devices that you can see or hear.  These devices let you know how you are doing and can be viewed on a computer screen or light, or perhaps via an auditory response like a tone or other sound.  Many times the feedback might just be a number to let you know how high or low, good or bad, strong or weak a signal is.

One example of biofeedback is to have a headband of electrodes placed on the forehead that measures the muscle activity in the face.  This is a great method for discovering if you hold tension in your facial muscles and can help you realize subtle things, like that you squint your eyes when you are thinking too hard, or it may pick up on activity that allows you to know that you clench your teeth when you are asked about work, which could explain the tension you keep having in your jaw or the headache you keep coming home with each night.

Once the biofeedback information is known, then you have data to help you zero in on specific relaxation techniques that can be used to remedy the problem.  For instance, if you discover that you clench your jaw, you can begin practicing activities during your day that help you stay aware of your jaw clenching and how to release the tension there frequently and repeatedly throughout your day.

There are biofeedback counselors across the nation who are trained to help you with your stress and anxiety.  Some can be found via the "practitioners" link through The Association for Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback, Inc., or you can find a number of devices to monitor your own biofeedback by doing a Google search for "biofeedback home units". 

Gaining insight into the way your body might be unconsciously reacting to stress is extremely helpful in knowing what steps can be taken to remedy the problem.

Thanks to Faraz Kahn for the above image - Biofeedback

Reading for Relaxation

It is well known that many people can’t seem to shut the lights off and go to sleep at night unless they’ve first sat back and relaxed with a good book.  Something about that down time helps to get the body calm and in “sleep mode”.  But the calming results from reading are not just for bedtime.  Taking a good book with you on your lunch break, while passing the time at the library, or just sitting at the park, is a great way to settle the body down and relax.

The entire process of reading a good book requires that we slow down physically, hold still, and settle the body into a relaxed position.  As we read, our heart rate begins to slow down, breathing slows and stabilizes, and muscle tension begins to relax as our attention is captured in the story line of our reading material.

In addition, the process of reading directs the mind to a point of concentration, which prevents distraction by all of the other potential worry thoughts that compete for our attention throughout the day. 

When selecting reading as your mode of relaxation, be picky of the material you choose.  There is a time and place for taking in the news of the day, or reading other business or personal information that has the potential to upset you.  But when choosing reading material for your relaxation time, be sure it is something you enjoy.  A novel, a magazine of special interest, or poetry if that is what relaxes you the most.  What matters is that it's material that captures your mind and soul.  

Thanks to Nadine Heidirch for the great photo - Reading